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Letting Go of the Fight

Oct 05, 2022

In order to be truly happier, consider that you may be called to let go of some of the battles, the fights, the wars in your life.

We all have them.

Arguments, fights, disagreements! 

There’s nothing wrong with fighting! With arguing! With being in disagreement!

But consider that holding on to a fight, long after it’s been had, or holding on to a righteous point of view, long after the argument is over, is now suggested to be both unhealthy scientifically, and a block to your happiness.

So how do we actually let go of a fight or an argument? 

How can we actually return to having a soft, kind and happy heart, after armoring up for a fight or disagreement?

The Step-by-Step Guide today offers you support in a practical way.

And the Scientific Research provided below 1  ‘The Science of Forgiveness’ provides other ways to support you

You will need:

  • A challenging conversation, argument, fight that feels unresolved
  • 20 minutes +
  • Pen and Paper
  • A safe quiet place to be undisturbed
  1. First, thank yourself and congratulate yourself for even being open to letting go of the fight. That’s not easy, but it’s a sign of great vulnerability and courage! So good job!
  2. Now answer this question in writing: What is wrong, bad, evil, or should not be the way that it was (regarding the situation)?
  3. Now Answer in writing: What is the bottomline of your judgment of the situation?
  4. Answer in writing: What do you need, in order to forgive this situation, and to let it go?
  5. Answer  in writing: What do you think you’ll feel inside of you, if you receive or experience what you wrote in Question 4?
  6. Consider that your health, and happiness is way more important than holding onto this situation. Choose to give yourself the feeling and experience of what you need. You can’t control the world, but you can control how you take care of yourself. Choose to give yourself the experience of what you need, even if it’s only in your imagination.
  7. Imagine, feel, experience whatever it is you wrote in Q4 for at least 17 seconds. This is the antidote you need in order to let go of the anger and hurt of this situation.
  8. Again, congratulate and thank yourself for being so open-minded and soft-hearted! You truly are a courageous and kind being… even if this was NOT easy to do.

If you have challenges or questions with this exercise, submit a Question for the LIVE Q&A this month! 


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CREDIT • Acknowledgements
Strategy by Zoë Lumiere
Step-by-Step Guide by Zoë Lumiere
Scientific Research by Everett Worthington
Quote by Jack Kornfield
Image used in Quote by Karsten Winegeart via unsplash

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